Poem: By Panic

To give it a name gives it power,
To understand it will unleash it.
Heart beating fast, there's no calming it,
Face flushed and hands to heavy to move.
Guttural gasps for vanished air,
I could breathe before but never again.
The sweat pouring from my reddened brow,
Tells me that it is over, the end.
I wish I never knew the reason,
The cause, the final diagnosis.
Without it maybe I could have lived,
Not normal but uninterrupted,
Without this cruel new understanding,
That I will be utterly consumed.